Royal Sick Day
by Kojinka
Summary: Dedede was never an easy person to get along with, and being sick made him even crankier. Yet Avina volunteers to look after the ailing king to give Escargoon a much needed break. Prepare for some lighthearted Dedede x OC banter.


King Dedede stood with his feet planted to the soft grass and his hammer tightly grasped in both flippers; his eyes narrowed on the pink puffball in front of him. The two rivals were about to make their charge at each other when a floating rainbow colored sphere appeared above them out of nowhere.

Both combatants were mysteriously drawn to the immense power radiating from the item. Without hesitation, the robed penguin leaped for the orb only to see Kirby going for it as well, giving it a few kicks! No way was the greedy monarch going to let that pink pest get what ever it was!

With a mighty swing of his hammer, he knocked Kirby away and pursued the sphere, only to be suddenly intercepted by a mustachioed man in green who shattered the orb with a chop of his hand. Its remains unleashed a powerful aura that engulfed his body.

The portly penguin did not like the look of that glow emitting from the man's eyes. He tried to run as far away as possible when the man began to dance, but he was not fast enough. Dedede suddenly found himself trapped in a mysterious rift that shrouded his mind in a debilitating fog.

He began to dance around and spin his hammer, unable to control his movements until he was suddenly tackled to the ground by… himself!? Only in slightly different clothes?! This was too much for the bewildered penguin! Who did this doppelganger think he was? "GIT YER GRUBBY HANDS OFFA ME, YA IMPOSTINATOR!" he hollered.

A feminine voice called out his name from the void and the king suddenly found himself back in his bedroom, thrashing frantically on the floor, drenched in sweat. "Pull yourself together, sire!" the voice shouted. "You were having a fever dream; a violent one at."

Once the panicking penguin gathered his wits, his flushed face grew a deeper shade of red when he saw a lavender Knuckle Joe with long white hair lying precariously on top of him. It was his media technician. "Avina? What the heck do you think you're doing?"

"Sorry," Avina sighed as she brushed her bangs out of her eyes. "I had to wake you somehow," She quickly scrambled off the king's bulbous belly as she noticed the force of gravity sliding her body toward his face.

The king locked eyes with Avina and grinned with a mischievous chuckle. "What's the matter, hun? Don't wanna get cozy with your sickly king?"

"Pft! As if!" Avina scoffed. "I'm just here to keep an eye on you while Escargoon is running errands!"

"Heh heh heh. You ruffle my feathers, and I ruffle yours." His raspy laugher escalated until it broke into a coughing fit. He laid his head back on the floor with a labored groan. Dedede very rarely got colds, but when he did, they hit him pretty hard.

"It's no fun being sick is it?" Avina almost felt bad for the suffering penguin as she grabbed his hand and hoisted him up. But he brought this upon himself by buying those viruses from NME. "Feeling smart?" she asked sarcastically.

Dedede, holding his throbbing head with his free hand while staggering along side the Knuckle Joe, was still under the allusion that catching a cold correlated with one's intelligence. It gave him a sense of pride in the presence of the smart alacky female, and he had every intention of rubbing it in as he let loose a powerful sneeze. "Smarter than you, apparently."

"You keep telling yourself that, big guy," Avina gently shoved Dedede into bed, having no choice but to play along with his delusions. His achy body made the light push feel rougher than it actually was.

"Hey, watch it! I ain't payin ya to toss me around!"

 _You hardly pay me anything at all._ "Sorry, Sire." Once she had Dedede settled in, Avina was about to step out when his weak yet commanding voice stopped her in her tracks. "Where do you think you're goin,' girly?"

"How am I supposed to look after you if I can't get some supplies?!"

"Shoulda thought of that before you came in here!"

"You were thrashing around in your sleep! I couldn't just stand by and let you hurt yourself!" The editor paused briefly and a sly smirk spread from ear to ear. "Oh, I get it. You're afraid to be left alone, aren't you?"

"I AM NOT!" Dedede barked. He wanted so badly to wipe that smug grin off with his fist.

Dedede was a horrible liar whenever he got worked up. It was pretty easy to tell by the thickness of his accent. Avina couldn't really blame his anxiety, but she couldn't resist pushing his buttons just a little more. "If you aren't afraid, then why do you need me to stick around?"

"C-cause I'm the king, and what I say goes!" The pesky technician had Dedede cornered, but he was too proud and stubborn to admit that he was frightened that he might have that dream again. It wasn't so much the dream, but rather the thought of losing control of his mind and body.

Avina growled in defeat. No matter how much she liked to push Dedede's buttons, she did know her place. Most of the time. Rather than push her luck any further, she pulled out a walkie talkie from her pocket and called one of the Waddle Dees.

The media technician decided to try to satiate her curiosity while waiting for her things to arrive. Something in that dream must have really disturbed Dedede if he didn't want to be left alone for even a brief moment. "So," the lavender Knuckle Joe took a seat next to Dedede's bedside and rested her hands on her chin, grinning ear to ear. "Care to tell me about the dream?"

"I don't need to tell you anything."

"Please? You're not offering me a whole lot to do here. Maybe talking about it will help you sleep better?"

Dedede shook his head curtly. "I ain't tired!"

It was clear that the persistent technician would not let it rest until Dedede gave in. "It wasn't another fireball Kirby dream, was it?"

"No!" Dedede shouted. His dignity had taken a blow when the entire town found out about that recurring nightmare during the meteor incident, and he wish nothing more than to pretend it never happened. His head throbbed too much to keep arguing despite his stubborn nature. "Fine! But if you tell anyone, I'll make sure you regret the day you set foot in my castle!"

"Your secret's safe with me."

"I was on a floating arena battling Kirby, and I sent that little pink nuisance flyin' back to the stars!"

"Okay?" Avina urged him to continue. _Well that explained the tribal dance._

As Dedede continued, Avina grew more intrigued. "A universe with multiple Dededes?" She exclaimed playfully. "Oh, how horrible!"

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that!" the narcissistic king murmured.

Dedede grew visibly nervous when a Waddle Dee in a blue bandana entered his quarters, wheeling in a cart with some medicine, towels, and a bowl of hot water on top and a black duffel bag beneath.

"Thank you, Bandana Dee! You're a dear."

"Any time, Lady Avina!" Even though Waddle Dees had no mouth, you could still sense a smile radiating from the servant.

"You," Dedede pointed to the Waddle Dee. Bandana Dee was one of the few Waddle Dees in his ranks who could communicate without needing Captain Waddle Doo to interpret. Even though he was one of the king's most trustworthy servants, the paranoid monarch preferred to play it safe. "Ya heard none of that! Do I make myself clear?"

Bandana Dee raised his right nub and saluted his king before taking leave.

Dedede turned to face Avina, shooting a warning glare at her. "Same goes for you, girly!"

"Gotcha!" Avina called out as she dug through her bag without looking away from it.

Dedede glared venomously as the Knuckle Joe pulled a thermometer from the bag and approached him with it. "What's that for?"

"To take your temperature, of course."

"No one goes near the royal tushterior!"

Avina furrowed her eyebrows in disgust once she registered where the king was coming from. " **It's an** _ **oral**_ **thermometer**!" she yelled in an authoritative tone that caught his highness off guard. She had had enough of Dedede's childish tirade as she pulled the covers off and shoved the object into his mouth. "And you better keep that in your mouth until I say so!"

Dedede had never seen his media technician so firm and assertive, and he prayed to Nova that no one else in the castle saw any of that, especially Escargoon.

He continued to glare daggers as Avina removed the thermometer. Her voice returned to her normal laid back tone. "There, that wasn't so bad was it?"

"If I weren't so sick, I'd bash your brains in!" The cranky king's glare remained unchanged as a drop of snot rolled down his beak.

The Knuckle Joe examined the thermometer and placed it in the bowl of hot water. The king's temperature was a little high, but nothing dangerous. She poured a glass of water and reached out for a couple pills, and handed them to Dedede. "Take these; they'll bring your fever down."

Dedede begrudgingly accepted the pills and downed them with the water. He'd teach that lousy technician a thing or two if he were feeling better.

A knock on the door sounded, and another waddle dee entered the king's quarters with a cart. "Ah! Your soup's ready!"

Dedede mumbled. He rarely turned down a meal, and this was no exception. Avina tucked a towel beneath his chin like a bib and placed the tray on his lap. She was about to spoon-feed him when he snatched the utensil from her hand with an unamused look. "What am I, a child?" the king retorted.

"Coulda fooled me," Avina rolled her eyes.

Knowing that anything he wanted to say to the girl would only prove her point, the king did not dignify her remark with a response, and glared silently.

Small drops of steaming broth spilled on the king's towel as he tried to navigate the spoon to his mouth with his trembling hand. After a few failed attempts, the frustrated monarch grumbled some incomprehensible curse words and handed the spoon to Avina. "If you tell anyone about this, I'll have you editing commercials in the dungeon!" He was aware that the studios already located down there, but was unable to come up any other empty threats.

Once Avina finished feeding the bedridden penguin, she turned the TV on and moved the tray to the cart for the Waddle Dees to retrieve.

Five minutes of silence passed between the king and the technician before she spoke the proud monarch's name in a soothing tone to which Dedede muttered an acknowledging grunt.

"There's no shame in being afraid."

"Told you I ain't 'fraid of anything!" he mumbled.

"You don't need to admit it. But there's nothing wrong with fearing for the well being of someone you care about… even if that someone is yourself…" There was an awkward pause as she laid her hand on his. "Take me for instance, when I found you thrashing around the room, I was afraid you might get hurt."

In one of the few times in his life, Dedede was left speechless as slew of thoughts filled his fevered mind. Why would Avina care about him? He didn't treat her any better than the rest of the castle staff, and it wasn't like she was obligated to care; she wasn't Escargoon or a Waddle Dee. She wasn't even originally from Pop Star. But he shrugged it off with his usual egocentric attitude of being the king.

"I'll stay right here and give you a nudge if you start sleep smashing again."

Dedede turned away from the technician and nuzzled into his pillow, gazing at the TV. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate the technician's presence. In fact, it was quite the opposite, even if she was a pain at times. He just wasn't very good at expressing his gratitude. He actually enjoyed their little back-and-forths, though he wouldn't admit it. Though she had a little bit of an attitude, very rarely was she disrespectful around him, and she usually handled his banter better than Escargoon did. Being a halfway decent cook didn't hurt anything either.

He could hear her softly sing along to the music on her laptop as he drifted in and out of consciousness, but was too drowsy to protest. His mind felt much more at ease knowing there was someone nearby if he had the dream again. His fatigue eventually won out as the media technician's melody lulled him to sleep.

Avina set her laptop aside and sighed in relief once she heard the king's heavy snoring through her ear buds. Even at his best behavior, King Dedede was never an easy person to get along with, and his illness made him even grouchier. Trying to nurse him gave Avina a clearer perspective on what Escargoon had to go through for a living, and it made her even more sympathetic for the overworked mollusk.

She walked up to the snoozing penguin and ran her hand through the moist plumage on his forehead. His skin underneath looked pale, but it felt like his fever was finally going down. He looked so peaceful in his slumber that you could barely tell it was the same egocentric tyrant who overworked his staff. She dabbed the sweat from his brow with a dry cloth and shook her head, silently cursing to herself. _What do I even see in you?_


End file.
